And all I have done so far is make a mental note that I have to consider this potential situation. The thought I even have to consider this potential situation stresses me. Something that has happened in my past has slithered back into my life and the option to "relive" it has come up, but with time and age, I have dealt with particular time in my life and layered other memories on top of it. I don't know if I want to dig through my life and try and find everything I've put away . Is that selfish? I have honestly spent a good amount of years learning how to hide the emotions and fears, why would I want to go through that again?
On the other hand if I do decide rekindle the past, there is a possibility that my story can help other people and people in the future. Right now I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place. I don't know what to do.....maybe with a couple of days, I'll figure it out. Maybe I should have said something 15 years ago.......Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
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You cant beat yourself up over something that happened when you were young, and maybe you didnt make the right decision. Your mind wasnt thinking like it thinks now. You have a matured mind, back then a very young inexperienced mind. I think if you have a chance to say or do something that can help certain people now and in the future, its worth it to them, and maybe in the process of doing that it will help you even more than before to put to rest the past.
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